Sunday Sessions with Sam: Listen! | Tuke's Quest

Sunday Sessions with Sam: Listen!

Hey Guys.
Happy Sunday!!
Ze blog finally reached 10,000 views (at 11:45pm last night) and I'm really happy about that, Yayyy, Progress!!!
Last month, there were two guest posts, one by Ihinosen who blogs here as "The Intelligent Man". His post got over 300 views but no comment, biko, why na?
The second one was by Sam and it got constructive feedback. Thanks for the comment Detomiwa, it helps mold our craft. Here's another one by Sam, do let us know what you think!
Enjoy!
Listen! That’s why you have TWO ears… become a better Listener


Have you ever wondered why you have TWO ears and just ONE mouth? Well, that’s because God wants us to listen more than we speak. Most people are better at SPEAKING than at LISTENING and this is one of the major problems of communication.
Good listeners are rare these days. Studies have shown that most listeners retain less than 50% of what they hear. Imagine what that means when it comes to a conversation that you might have with your boss, a friend, colleague, or a customer. If you speak for ten minutes, chances are that you heard about half (50%) of that conversation, and so have they, this makes miscommunication unavoidable.
Thus LISTENING is one of the most vital skills needed to communicate effectively, and we need to listen for reasons such as; building relationships, understanding others, to be entertained, to learn, to show empathy and also to get information.
Listening can do so much for us; it can help us become more productive at work, more connected in our relationships, improve our ability to persuade and negotiate with others, and makes us more efficient in everything we do.
Now let me share some tips to help you become a better listener.
An integral part of becoming a better listener is Self-Awareness, being aware of your own behaviour, feelings and habits. Take time to become aware of your own listening behaviour in different scenarios: at work, home, with friends, strangers or in a group.
To be aware of this, you need to notice your body language, eye contact, how well you can repeat what was said verbatim, and your level of concentration on a message, not your response to what was said. Being self-aware will help you get better at listening to others.
Another way of becoming a better listener is being an Active listener; active listening involves being attentive and involved in a conversation in which you are listening. You should be able to speak without distortion or miscommunication and this majorly requires concentration and practice.
There are five key things we need to practice to become a better active listener, and they are;
1. Paying close attention: this involves giving undivided attention to the speaker by giving eye contact, avoiding mental preparation of response, avoiding distractions in the environment, and also avoiding side conversations.
2. Having an open and relaxed body language: this can be done by nodding from time to time, using facial expression, and using small comments that affirm your acceptance/disapproval of what’s being said.
3. Always check for understanding: as much as you are trying to listen, don’t mistranslate or misinterpret. We all have different personal experiences, perceptions and feelings which can influence how we hear. Paraphrase, summarize and ask questions when not clear about the information you are provided with.
4. Don’t interrupt the speaker: this is one of the most difficult things to learn and practice in active listening, but you will only be limiting your chance of understanding the message when you interrupt the speaker.
5. Respond to the message appropriately: after you have gotten information from the speaker, the next thing is to form your response. When expressing your thought, be honest, open and respectful.
Modelling these active listening steps will help improve your listening skills, make your communication more effective and productive.
You may need to employ some additional methods in order to improve your listening skills, please feel free to share your opinion and tips in the comment box.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Samuel Akinlotan
HR Practitioner

Twitter: @HeraclesAyo
Share

6 comments:

  1. Nice post. I feel like this is a topic people in relationships should also know about- knowing how to be good listeners to your partner when sorting out issues.
    www.folasoasis.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Very very true, communication is so key and it helps avoid misunderstandings.

      Delete
  2. i enjoyed reading this post....i copied it so i cant study it at home.
    Thanks for sharing
    The Beautiful Eagle

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You're welcome...glad you enjoyed it!!

      Delete
  3. OMG... this is like a spin-off off from my most recent blog post. http://tonipeters.blogspot.co.uk/2014/07/are-we-talking-or-having-conversation.html

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Loved reading it!! What a coincidence! Great minds think alike, ayy?!

      Delete